And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I just found puke in my bra..
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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