I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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