Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
