It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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