No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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