Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
