My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Randomize
