So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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