piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
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