wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
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