Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
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i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
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Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
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