Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
Randomize