How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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