Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Randomize
