I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Randomize