i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
