I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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