i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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