i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
