This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
