That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
