if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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