Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
