Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
