A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
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