im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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