We won't sleep together?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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