he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
i dont even know how to be here
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize