Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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