you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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