but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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