Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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