i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
