Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
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