that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize