I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I need to stop coming to work sober
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
