i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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