i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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