Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
What a fucking waste of an outfit
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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