You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Randomize
