We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.