omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize