"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
