my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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