it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
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I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
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Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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