how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
high people should be assigned attendants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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