I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
