right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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