i think my tv is drunk
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
