Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i dont even know how to be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
It was like getting head from an anaconda
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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