Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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