I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
May the power of my ass compel you!!
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize