singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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